Well guys, it’s finally here, day 30 of my #31DaysofHorror! We’re getting right up to the big day, I sure hope you’re all as excited as I am. Anyways, as usual, please feel free to share your favourite Halloween movies, traditions and thoughts in the comments, or play along with me on Instagram with the tag #BarleyDoesHorror. Now, on with the show.
I’m heading into the small pile of movies from my own collection that I’ve never actually seen. There aren’t a ton of these, but every now and again I grab one that’s on sale and hard to resist. So, with a pretty slow month for new horror movies being readily available for me, what better way to continue this series than with my own collection. Anyways, popped this one in, and was teleported back to the 1980s. So we’ll kick things off with the plot :
Aliens who look like clowns come from outer space and terrorize a small town.
Ahhh the 80s, a time of magical casual racism, sexism, and terrible movies. I had sort of expected this one to be a fun 80s gorefest, and I was cheated out of that, in exchange for something stupid. Somehow this movie has 6.1/10 on IMDB, and I really don’t understand why. Maybe there is some kind of nostalgic value for some, but come on you guys. Expect more, even from terrible B-Movies.
What I will say about this movie on the positive end is that the clowns are sort of fun to watch. The weird, horrendous puppet faces and costumes are funny and charming in their own right, and I would have loved to see more of the clown snakes, but they’re pretty short lived unfortunately. That said, the movie doesn’t go nearly far enough to have such an absurd premise. The deaths are largely blood-less, and involve a ray gun that wraps people in cotton candy. There is one ‘violent’ death where a biker has his head punched off, but it just doesn’t deliver what it should. Honestly, this is one of those movies that could do with a good humoured, bloody remake. Maybe and Adam Green production?
The story is stupid, the acting is bordering on unwatchable. I know that movies like this aren’t known for their well crafted plots of characters, but this time around, it honestly just felt rushed and lazy. Nothing about this even seemed to be especially clever or funny, or even taking a stab at something. There’s really just nothing here but a sterile bunch of nonsense. It could have really been a whole bunch of fun, but it just wasn’t.
Disclaimer: If this is your favourite movie ever, that’s ok. Just like the things you like and shut up.
So, all in all, this is a dry, boring, lazy movie that really doesn’t take the premise nearly as far as it should have, and falls so far short of hitting the mark. If you haven’t seen it yet, you’re really not missing much except for some kind of fun clown costumes, and a fight with a giant clown at the end. Overall, worth the miss.
FINAL GRADE : D